A couple of years ago I heard something scary. I learned that I was about to be broken. Sounds a little stupid, a little dramatic, but it’s true. And I brushed it off, saying it wasn’t a sure thing, but then… yep, there I was, broken and a mess. There’s a lot more detail, but it isn’t important.
So, as I felt better, I accepted that the brokenness was good. I didn’t know why, but I knew it was good. I became more mature, and in the end I learned how to have a little more faith. But I still didn’t understand why, I just knew that if it was what God allowed to happen, it was ok.
And then I learned something. First off, I knew I dug that hole for myself. I was a stubborn, obnoxious human. So God did not cause my brokenness, I did. This is truth. We cause our problems. I knew that, I just want to make that clear so no one mistakes my next comment. God simply used my brokenness. My mistakes, my pain, my denial was all redeemed. I pulled, and pulled, and pulled, BUT GOD used that. So know this truth- God is NOT the author of evil or brokenness. He is the Healer, the Light, the Love, and the Life. He does not orchestrate evil or sin. We push, we pull, because in His sovereignty He chose to give us choice. He could change it, but He gives us the option to choose Him in love. Why? Because as my father would say, “He does not want robots.” Never accuse our good God of evil.
“Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.”
1 John 4:8
“For everything created by God is good”
1 Timothy 4:4
“Give thanks to the LORD, for He is good, for His steadfast love endures forever.”
Point being through all this, God is not to blame for our wrongs. I am fully responsible for my mistakes and brokenness. BUT GOD does not leave me or you there. He uses our mistakes and our brokenness just like he used Joseph’s brokenness, David’s brokenness, Paul’s brokenness, and Peter’s brokenness, just to name a few.
“But He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
2 Corinthians 12: 9-10
This brings me to the next point- I am content. In fact, I can smile and rejoice for the brokenness that taught me a little more about how faithful our God is. He is truly good, and ever faithful to us. Trusting Him gets a little bit easier each time I realize just how patient He has been, and how much He saves me. Not just once, from eternal death, but daily from myself.
My brokenness was a mercy. It sounds backwards, because I said and say again- He saves me daily from myself. But sometimes He allows me to make a mess, to go my way, and to wreck things a little, because I am just that stubborn. This too is His mercy. He shows me through this just how faithful He is. When we are faithless, He truly remains faithful. He shows His mercy in many ways, and at this point, I can honestly say that I am thankful for being broken. Being broken made me realize that I don’t got this. I don’t have it as together as I thought, and I need to work on a lot of things. There are things that used to matter that now don’t. I have a long road to maturity, BUT GOD is bringing me closer to Him a little bit every day, even through my brokenness. So yes, even when I feel like I’m having the worst day ever, God saves me.
“But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ – by grace you have been saved…”
So in our brokenness and weakness, God’s mercy and grace is revealed. His power is revealed. Y’all, I can not stop smiling this week. A year ago this week I could barely bring myself to fake a smile. Now I cannot stop. I hope this encourages you today. God takes our hurt and mess ups to bring about the best. Trust Him. He is truly good. His grace is enough.